Santa Cia da Teheran – OpEd
“I TRY TRUMP!”
In a political fiction “Santa Cia da Teheran,” which originally was booked to be published in 2017, but after Trump’s election can be discarded by the publisher, if nothing else because fiction cannot anticipate reality, one of the characters, a CIA agent, of full liberal political views and a strong supporter of Obama, when facing future war activity of the USA government in Iran, declares that he would not be happy if Iran were to be invaded in 2017, and he therefore declares his preference: “I TRY TRUMP”.
The fiction is the story of a coup organized by the British Secret Service based in Rome to celebrate the coup of 1953 against Iran’s then democratically elected PM.
At that time, Mosaddeq, after his election, had been busy introducing unemployment compensation, payment to sick and injured workers, abolishing the forced labor of peasants in landlords’ estates and through the taxation of 20% of the landlord’s revenues he had been constructing public baths and rural housing. Obviously, he had to be tired of working so much for his people and the nationalization of the country’s oil company, a further tiring enterprise, which definitely persuaded British PM Sir Winston Churchill, to convince President Eisenhower to jointly give Mosaddeq a rest.
Churchill knew how tough the life of a PM can be, from the time in which he by properly interpreting the British God’s will, had changed fossil coal ships energy to that of liquid oil energy, which had the little inconvenience that coal was present on English soil, while oil was present on Arab soil, and therefore Turkey had to be dislodged from the Arab land. A tiring job if any, to keep out of the Middle East oil fields, but God, as everybody’s know, saves the Queen and British PMs could not be of less dedicated attention. Therefore restoring full British control of the oil company, nationalized by Mosaddeq, was a way to not only to provide him some needed rest, Mosaddeq remained at home for all his future remaining years of life (14 since 1953), but also to fulfill the British God’s will.
But since not all that is good ends up well – or at least doesn’t last well forever – the problem of restoring the British God’s will on Iran’s oil fields in subsequent years revived. It is by now clear that Ayatollah Khomeini had not been properly informed of the British God’s will, therefore subsequent British PMs had been pushed back into the necessary obligation, if not moral duty, to restore proper control over Iran’s oil.
And here we are in our political fiction, when, obviously for humanitarian reasons, to some British secret agents, 2016 seems to be a proper year to restore the British God’s will in Iran’s oil fields. In the fiction, as it happened in 1953, cousin CIA is called to sustain a proper coup d’état, but this time the CIA agent does his best to promote its failure. He doesn’t want to see Obama’s agreement be destroyed, and he cooperates in making the English secret service initiative fail. Of course since God’s will doesn’t change so easily and the British God’s will seems to be particularly stubborn, the coup d’état is only postponed to 2017, hoping for a positive reaction from the new American President, and that is the moment when the CIA agent, whose name is Cant Believe, decides to say that “I try Trump”! Why?
He feels that the President-elect Trump will not be fully available to make immediate war on Iran, not only because he has a chance to read in advance the fiction “Santa Cia da Teheran” (let’s hope he wants to use it for a peace-making reality show), but also because his idea of avoiding in intervening all the time, and everywhere, could make him the President who is able to promote peace in the Middle East, and also to prompt a more peaceful general attitude.
That peace could be possible even though Fox News commentator Bill O’Reilly, with his usual liberal tolerant approach, tries to press Mr. Trump for a future war, which could be a surprise not only for his audience, but for American liberals. “If you become President – repeatedly asks the over-tolerant Bill to Mr. Trump – will you make war on Iran?”
But since to his regret the candidate President insists that he is in favor of tougher negotiations, and doesn’t seem that ready for the war, the tolerant Bill eventually moves on — also because he has some other items on his tolerant agenda to promote: the acceleration of climate change in the next presidency, a substantial increase of college fees, the obvious elimination of health care assistance…. War on Iran is needed, but so too those other liberal initiatives need to be promoted with the possible next President. Tolerant O’Reilly doesn’t want to neglect any chance to promote prompt and easier disasters through Fox News to humanity, or at least to the American people.
When we move from the fiction to the reality, surprisingly enough for all sophisticated pollsters, Mr. Trump remains on the stage, this time not as a favored candidate of the CIA agent of fiction, but as a real President of the country. How could it be possible the election of a President that had been such a good loser in all polls, nobody knows. One of the possible explanations of this amazing event is that voters did not read in a proper way the pollsters, otherwise they would have got rid of Donald Trump well in advance. Not that they didn’t have a chance to abide by the polls, there were plenty of opportunities. First during the primaries, then after the debates with Hillary, finally during the last week confrontations. The polls were totally clear, Trump had no chance to win the presidency, so why did the American people vote for him? The people had only to decide which poll to follow to drop candidate Trump, that’s all. But obviously they failed to read those polls properly.
OK. Mr. Trump’s election satisfies agent Cant Believe – but Cant Believe is a good agent and we think that he will be able to spread his opinion in his agency – but we now face the tolerant Bill O’Reilly’s tough question: Will the new President make war on Iran? Is there a chance that the most unexpected Republican candidate winner, already to become the most unexpected presidential candidate winner, can become the most unexpected peace-maker winner in the Middle East? Cant Believe thinks so, but why does the most liberal CIA agent support the least ever liberal presidential candidate?
The author of the political fiction ventures to view as a possible good omen for peace with Iran the cabinet members chosen by Mr. Trump. In the author’s view, there is an interesting, challenging decision Mr. Trump made in selecting a cabinet full of businessmen that the media and liberals have not properly appreciated. For the first time in the American government the people will be able to recognize the direct interests of people that make the political decisions.
Wow! We move away – at least for a while – from strong ideology that sometimes prevents us from properly separating bad and good, and we enter into a pragmatic business approach. This can have surprising positive impacts on peace. Of course if we keep presenting Trump as a bad guy and strongly oppose every decision he makes, we’ll push him in a dangerous extreme rightist corner position. Even in Iran. But if CIA Agent Cant Believe is able to spread his views of Trump’s positive approach, the plan of the British secret service will remain isolated. If that is the case, Iran’s sovereignty has a good chance of being respected. Let’s hope Santa Cia da Teheran becomes a popular reality show in which Trumps plays the Middle East peace role, disappointing some of the publishers who are not ready for such a real political fiction ending. But Cant Believe says, I try Trump. Let’s hope he is right!
*The author of Santa Cia da Teheran, Umberto Sulpasso, is a professor of knowledge economy dedicated to calculate the Gross Domestic Product of India. Author of Darwinomics, occasionally he writes political fictions or political plays that usually publishers refuse because they are too much anticipating of life reality shows, and as such, not reliable for publishing.
